CHILDREN WHO BECOME HIGH SCHOOL SHOOTERS
Kabbalist Rav Berg taught me something as we sat in a restaurant in Queens NY about 28 or so years ago. He said we can give our children all the parenting advice in the world; we can read the best parenting books, and share the latest child psychologist methods for raising well-adjusted children. But, the Rav said, that is still only 1% of what our kids truly need.
The remaining 99% comes from the Light, that unseen divine energy Force that animates the atoms, our universe, our world, mother nature and the very neurons in our brain.
If we can plug our kids into the 99%, so that supernal Light fills their being, then we will truly raise kids who embody dignity and respect for others.
We need to do both.
Plug our kids into the Light of the 99%.
And share the 1% lessons as well.
Now they will have 100%.
We plug our kids into the Light by sharing the very wisdom of Zohar, and by using the raw, naked power of the Zohar’s verses, words and letters, which infuse our being with that Energy of the 99% reality.
Most important, a parent’s own behavior IS the single most influential factor in raising our kids. It’s not what we tell them or teach them with our words, that impacts their own behavior; rather, it’s how WE live, and how we change, and grow, that influences them on a soul, emotional and spiritual level.
There is always an spiritual umbilical cord between parent and child, and how we change impacts our children.
The problem is, most of us are afflicted with a syndrome known as “Do as I say, not as I do.”
We love to tell our children, and our friends, family, and our government leaders for that matter, how to behave. We project. Instead, we must embody that which we want to see in others. Period.
Finally, the Rav told me that when I play with my children, I should not just play with them when it’s fun for me. Instead, I should play with my children when I am absolutely too busy to play, but they’re asking for time and attention; and then I should get right down onto the floor and enter their world, heart and soul.
That change of internal character in myself, breaking my impatience, is what ignites the Light inside my children.
And when a critical mass of parents live this behavior with their own children, the world will give birth to well-adjusted, emotionally balanced adults who embody dignity and respect and kindness.
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Great blog. So very true about the parental role. Just read about that in The Drama of the Gifted Child by Alice Miller — an interesting perspective on how the littlest things a parent does can create a core wound that will crop up later down the road in a child’s life.